Divine Connections!!

Today, I have decided to start a new category in my blog which is “Music”.  Music plays a vital part in my life and as such, I thought this should be reflected in my blog.  The idea is that I enter these songs as new posts as I either listen to them or discover them for the first time.  I believe there is a reason why different people like different music.  Each song connects to each of us in a different way because we can relate to the experience described in the song, or simply because its music transports us either to a place where we would like to be in or where we have already been.

The first song I have chosen to include in this category is called “So Sick” by Ne-Yo.  No other reason than I was just cooking our dinner tonight, and I randomly played my R&B playlist and this song came up.  If you are not familiar with it, simply click this link: http://www.deezer.com/track/924800

So Sick by Ne-yo

Gotta change my answering machine
Now that I’m alone
Cuz right now it says that we
Can’t come to the phone
And I know it makes no sense
Cuz you walked out the door
But it’s the only way I hear your voice anymore
(it’s ridiculous)
It’s been months
And for some reason I just
(can’t get over us)
And I’m stronger than this
(enough is enough)
No more walkin round
With my head down
I’m so over being blue
Cryin over you
And I’m so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said I’m so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why can’t I turn off the radio?
Gotta fix that calendar I have
That’s marked July 15th
Because since there’s no more you
There’s no more anniversary
I’m so fed up with my thoughts of you
And your memory
And how every song reminds me
Of what used to be
That’s the reason I’m so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said I’m so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why can’t I turn off the radio?
(Leave me alone)
Leave me alone
(Stupid love songs)
Dont make me think about her smile
Or having my first child
Let it go
Turning off the radio
Cuz I’m so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing she was still here
Said I’m so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why can’t I turn off the radio?
(why can’t I turn off the radio?)
Said I’m so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing she was still here
Said I’m so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why can’t I turn off the radio?
(why can’t I turn off the radio?)

And I’m so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said I’m so sick of love songs so sad and slow
Why can’t I turn off the radio?
(why can’t I turn off the radio?)
Why can’t I turn off the radio?

 

 

I like this song, I suppose, because it expresses something very typical of the human nature.  Half of our self regrets how we cling to past experiences that we are trying desperately to move away from, and the other half, our weaker side, if you like, clings for dear life to the memories and the dreams of what could have been. 

This is a dichotomy that affects all relationships, not just the “romantic” ones.  Have you ever been in a friendship that you know saps the energy out of you; that brings the worst out in you, where the other person takes, takes and takes some more, and never gives back, or worse still, they give whilst they are getting something from you, but when you are no longer of any use to them, they forget and discard you like an old piece of furniture?  I can certainly think of a few people I have met along the way whose friendship has been very much along the lines I have just described. 

You know you are being used; you know that person is your friend not because of you, but because of what that friendship can provide him/her at any given time, and despite knowing that, you keep giving the other person the benefit of the doubt, excusing their behaviour because of their own adverse circumstances, hoping that the next time, things will change and they will be a genuine friend, because they love who you are and not what you can add to their life.  The fear of rejection and the need for acceptance can be so strong and desperate sometimes that one can become addicted to giving undeserving friends second chances again and again.  The fear of letting go is such that we take the path of least resistance and allow ourselves to be humiliated time and time again, instead of facing what is staring us right in the face, cutting our loses and getting shot of that very consuming “friendship” or “friend-ship-wreck”.

I am a Christian, and I like to always try and forgive as I have been forgiven so many times myself, but I have come to know, after much hurtful rejection, that there are God-given friendships, which are easily recognised because contact with them inspires you to become the best person you can be, and there are ungodly friendships and/or relationships that rob your joy and security one little bit at a time. 

Before I became a follower of Jesus Christ (it is more like catching up than following, but I thank God that at least I am now in the same path), I was absolutely desperate to belong, to be loved and accepted by the “in crowd”.  You know what I mean, the popular, well-known and well-liked (or so it seemed) group of people that everyone knows about, everyone talks about.  I don’t know how many times I hit that wall of sheer defeat when I realised yet again I had been used and things were not what they seemed.

Now I am a different person.  I know who I am in Christ and I know where I am going.  Jesus has broken the chains of the need for acceptance, the need to please, the need to belong. The truth is I have always belonged, but in a different place, with a different crowd.  God has always known this, but I was blind and I could not see.   It has taken a few knocks, a few heartaches, many tears and much self-delusion, but it is thanks to all those painful things, that I am now in a place where I am able to recognise true and God-given friends and bogus and hollow ungodly friendships for what they are; I am now able to protect myself from the destructive impact that a wrong friendship can have, and I have enough understanding and revelation of who God made me to be to break up and reject certain relationships and friendships before they become cancerous in my life.

When I look back at my life and see where I am at now and what it took to get here, I am bowled over and utterly amazed at how the God who made the stars and the heavens has been, in his love and mercy, guiding my every step, holding my hand and being the kind of friend that I never thought I could find:  the one that always looks out for you and has your best interests at heart; the one that accepts you and loves you for who you are, mistakes and all. 

Do all the friendships you have fill you with the hope and self-belief that you can become a better person; do they inspire you to to chase your hidden dreams or do they instead pull you down into a pit of regret and guilt that can’t let you see beyond the flawed being that you are? Is every relationship you are in one of mutual edification or one of masqueraded false motives that will eventually tear you down?


Advertisements

2 thoughts on “Divine Connections!!

  1. i just wanted to thank you for taking the time to respond on my blog, I have responded to your comment as well but did not think it would make sense posting it here. Take care.

  2. Thanks for the post and for directing me here! I agree with you, that some friendships are God-given and other’s aren’t. Although my problem isn’t quite like you described, some parts did apply, and I thank you!

    Blessings,
    Em

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s