TO MY DEAR SISTER IN CHRIST, BELLE. BELLE BY NAME, BELLE BY NATURE

A couple of weeks ago I wrote the post below.  I would like to dedicate this post and specially the song at the end to my dear sister in Christ, Belle.  I have never witnessed the spirit of Christ more alive than I have witnessed in this person, but with that privilege comes suffering beyond human understanding.  Please pray for my sister in Christ.

Be blessed my friend!

X

Mercedes

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Please look at the pictures on the link below before reading this post, which show some beautiful scenes in the British landscape unheard of for this time of the year.

http://news.uk.msn.com/in-pictures-britain-enjoys-mini-heatwave#image=1

The last three days have displayed wonderful vestiges of glorious mid-summer sun, warmth and brightness here in the South East of England.  Amazing blessing not to be taken for granted, as we are about to enter the autumnal month of October known here for its relentless cold temperatures and unsettled weather.  It is a very welcome sight indeed to see people with beaming smiles and a demeanour which oozes hope and ease.

And yet in contrast with such delight, I find myself struggling with the idea that behind the wonders of the weather and the apparent contentment all around, the picture that lurks behind not only in my own life but in that of most, is somewhat a sharp contrast by comparison.  We try to cling desperately to the idea that just because the weather encourages a happy mood, one is to live in such a state of endless hope and optimism as if our daily troubles and worries had nothing to do with us.  Maybe that is exactly it: for many of us such troubles and worries unless intricately connected to us and ultimately an influencing factor in the course of our life, truly have nothing to do with us and so we just keep pressing on as if the pain and the hurt we witness within and all around was taking place in a different reality far far away from us. The human mind is truly fascinating!

The wonderful weather has meant I have been walking a fair amount recently, specially to and from my son’s school.  I normally take the scenic route which runs alongside a beautiful field parallel to the main road where the ongoing traffic keeps coming like arrows across the battlefields of old.  This morning I couldn’t help but notice the striking and startling contrast of two realities which do not often, at least in the world I am familiar with, coexist.  On the one hand one could see the promise of scorching temperatures to arrive later in the day given away by the vague pink line in the horizon, just above the trees.  Sun on my face, already too hot to have my cardigan on.  And yet as my senses processed that information, I couldn’t help but also notice simultaneously  the hundreds of brown leaves already on the ground as one would expect for this time of the year.  Not a scene one often witnesses in this part of the world on the last day of September.

And so as I continued walking I realised that this very picture pretty much reflects my existence right now, an existence which not long ago was uni-lateral, balanced, peaceful, predictable, harmonious, purposeful though misguided and misunderstood by myself as much as by anyone else.  My faith was strong but weak, my trust in God unquestionable but also only slightly put to the test. Truly my pride and not God was my tower of strength.  Discerning but blind in the things that truly mattered to my Godly purpose.  I lived convinced I was relying on God with my every breath, my every decision, my every pursuit, and yet I was living an illusion as what I thought was fiery furnace of testing and refining, was merely a 30 second spin in the microwave, and just as microwaved food the end result lacked depth and catalytic transformation within.

BUT, today my reality is full of contradiction like the high “summer” temperatures coexisting with the autumnal leaves in the Southeastern fields of England.  The woman whose house was immaculate enough to feed off the floor and to entertain kings and queens, no longer has the ability to take pride in her home because she cleans as and when she is able to.  A thriving new business, a battle with the local authority to win a statement of special needs for our son, and the recurring debilitating pain on my neck and back which every now and then has me bed-ridden for hours have meant that time is no longer my own and chaos, surprise and spontaneity are the distinctive factors of my existence right now.  Before I could choose when to have guests who could marvel at my standards of cleanliness.  Now due to the nature of our business, I have endless numbers of professionals entering my home, who often arrive unannounced and who often find my home upside down, inside out, and who find me, well.., let’s just say, little dignity and pride remain once they have gone.  Before I was a control-freak, a perfectionist, a people pleaser. Now, not by personal choice, but because God gives us what we need and often not what we pray for, I am a wreck but a joyful wreck who lives each day challenged by what life may throw at me and knowing deep down whatever comes no matter how much I resist it or try to control it and its outcome, the point of the exercise is to learn to ride with it, to not oppose it or postpone it, to simply look up, take God’s hand and off we go again on the next most exhilarating, but often most stressful and anxiety filled ride of your life, but a ride that has a heavenly purpose, a ride which seeks to not leave you as you are on your way to self-destruction, on your way to seeking after the things of this world which will deteriorate over time, just as we will, things of little lasting value which puff us up with feelings of superiority, accomplishment, vanity and pride, but a ride which seeks to teach you to let go and let God, to teach you to truly get on your knees not to ask for what you want, but to seek revelation as to why things are the way they are and then knowing their meaning to plead with God to give you the grace to enter into them willingly and to blindly trust and accept wholeheartedly that though you cannot really see where you are going, you cannot get there unless the chaos, the pain, the surprise and the spontaneity elements are an essential part of that journey.

And yet, despite all this I find myself experiencing a new all-encompassing, all-embracing, all-liberating and all-energising grace from God where I no longer beat myself up if I don’t make time to pray and read scripture everyday, if I don’t find time everyday to take others’ needs on board but my own and those of my family, if I act in anger, fear or selfishness as the chaos that surrounds me exorcises the control-freak nature within me.  The external chaos forces me to make peace the sap within that keeps me alive, and the ongoing darts of fire that keep hitting me are making my resilience and determination to pursue God bullet proof, unbreakable. And through it all sometimes up right, close and personal, and sometimes distant and aloof for days on end I sense the presence of God in my life leading me on towards a goal, towards a place where one day it will all make sense, it will all be revealed as gold refined and purified in this most arduous and challenging of journeys called life.

I find this passage in scripture to be a rock on which I lean and rest my weary body, mind and soul often. May it give you hope and strength today and always:

2 Corinthians 4

¹ Therefore, since through God’s mercy we have this ministry, we do not lose heart. ² Rather, we have renounced secret and shameful ways; we do not use deception, nor do we distort the word of God. On the contrary, by setting forth the truth plainly we commend ourselves to everyone’s conscience in the sight of God. ³ And even if our gospel is veiled, it is veiled to those who are perishing. ⁴ The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel that displays the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. ⁵ For what we preach is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, and ourselves as your servants for Jesus’ sake. ⁶ For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,”^[a]made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ.

⁷ But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. ⁸ We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; ⁹ persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. ¹⁰ We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. ¹¹ For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body. ¹²So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.

¹³ It is written: “I believed; therefore I have spoken.”^[b] Since we have that same spirit of^[c] faith, we also believe and therefore speak, ¹⁴ because we know that the one who raised the Lord Jesus from the dead will also raise us with Jesus and present us with you to himself. ¹⁵All this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God.

¹⁶ Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. ¹⁷ For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. ¹⁸ So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

PLEASE PRAY FOR THE UK!!

It is hard not to feel downcast and discouraged this morning as we continue to hear in the news about the absolute mayhem and chaos assailing the UK in these last few days.  The powers of hell are alive and kicking and intensifying by the minute, which if you are a believer in Jesus Christ, you will understand as meaning that Christ’s return is all the nearer.

Are we ready for His return? Are we ready for the onslaught that will be caused as a result of the tension between light and darkness tightening?  Is the Christian population on its knees seeking God or are we still short-sighted and blinded by our own man-made enterprises with no biblical foundation? My stomach churns this morning as I hear of the madness and darkness engulfing the streets of the UK today.  I am reminded of the aftermath of the Haitian earthquake and  hurricane Katrina which left thousands of people homeless and with nothing left to call their own.  No such event is taking place here, no such tragedy has hit our shores, and so one has to ask what is causing this pure evil in our streets if not a lack of discernment between good and evil, a lack of spiritual direction, of firm morals, and understanding of God’s sovereignty above all He created.  The whole world seems to be spiralling out of control, and for once, man is beginning to admit and see that no intelligence, no scheme, no tactic will be able to get things back on track.  We are finally beginning to see it is only by God’s grace that the world has come this far, or are we?

I don’t mean to be pessimistic or negative, but when will we acknowledge that apart from the Lord we can do nothing, we are nothing?  The world and its leaders have been given ample opportunity for many generations to love God and to follow Christ, but we continue trying to do in our own strength what only God can do.  The Church itself meant to be shining as a light, a city on a hill in this hour, it’s shining, but shining for its absence as it remains self-focused and self-serving.  Where can the lost turn, where can those paralysed by fear turn, where can those looking for hope and a future turn when all many churches care about is inflating their membership lists and the egos of those at the helm who only care about being seen to have recognition and credibility in this world?

We need to get on our knees now and seek God with all we have, not on a Sunday morning or during our weekly prayer meetings, but right now in our homes alone or with others.  It is only in that quiet place, alone with God, in humility, that we will be able to discern what God is saying to his people in this hour.  It is only there that we will be equipped through the Holy Spirit with everything we need to face the darkness that is ahead, and able to encourage others in this most challenging hour.

Our nation and many others have had it so easy for so long. Oh Lord, how could we be so greedy and so blind?  In our selflessness and security, in our complacency, we have simply forgotten that it is only by the grace of God that we made it this far, that we enjoy the wealth and the freedom we enjoy today; it is only by the grace of God that our prosperous nations are not on the news everyday at the hands of a famine which is exterminating and depleting at unstoppable speed.  It is by the grace of God alone that we have food on the table, a roof over our heads, and clothes on our back.  It is by the grace of God even and foremost that we have faith in the ONE who blessed us and yet allowed others in His omniscience to suffer hunger, disease, exploitation, abuse and slavery.  What will it take for man to acknowledge the supremacy of God, the Holiness of Jesus Christ?

God said in Hosea 13: 6-8:

“When I fed them, they were satisfied; when they were satisfied, they became proud; then they forgot me.  So I will come upon them like a lion, like a leopard I will lurk by the path.  Like a bear robbed of her cubs, I will attack them and rip them open.  Like a lion I will devour them; a wild animal will tear them apart.”

Please pray for the UK as we navigate these turbulent waters.  I was going to ask that we pray for the world’s economy but I know that what is happening today is all part of God’s plan and also it feels obscene for me to ask God to protect those nations which today are in danger of collapse as their economies come under threat, when there are already so many other countries in the world which for years have been at the mercy of others’ compassion and charity and so little has been done to help them, when we could have done so much more.  It is at this hour that things will be revealed for what they were and are.  The Christian books, ministries, conferences, training, etc investing millions of pounds and dollars to puff us up with knowledge when all along all that was asked of us was to love God and our neighbour.  God have mercy on our souls, for we have failed to do the one thing which we had been asked to do.  Our prosperity, our knowledge and our faith were freely given as a gift and a blessing to in turn touch the lives of others who don’t know Christ, and all we have done with such gifts has been to puff ourselves up with more things, knowledge and power which we did not need, as Christ himself is our rock, our foundation, our strength and our only hope.  There is nothing left to do, noting left to say.  This is a time to be still and simply repent with fear and trembling, to seek God, to humble ourselves and to seek forgiveness for so miserably failing to act on his simple command to love God and to love others as ourselves.

PRAY, PRAY , PRAY